On Healing.
On Healing.
Everybody hurts, sometimes. This common experience is part of what connects us all. There will be times in our lives when we experience indescribable pain, and unhappiness.
There are no quick fixes for healing sadness. Sometimes it can help to recognize the things that will make a difference, and help you to slowly cover ground as you heal.
Time. Getting the minutes, hours, days, weeks and months under our belts. There is no real hurrying healing up, and the saying attributed to the poet Robert Frost: “The only way out, is through” is particularly relevant here.
Feeling. Experiencing the feeling as fully as we can. No denial, or avoidance. Allowing the feeling to be felt, fully in our being. Whether it is anger, extreme sadness, or disappointment, it will not even begin to move on until it has been fully acknowledged, and felt, for as long as it needs to be recognized.
Talking. Sharing our sadness with others, and talking through things with those who care for us is always a valuable therapy.
Perspective. Adjust the lens that we look through. Another angle can provide another viewpoint, and renewed perspective can sometimes bring peace.
Nature. The natural world continuing according to its own rhythm, regardless of our pain and circumstances. Nature grows, blossoms, blooms, breathes, and busies itself, completely in the moment. Taking time to be in nature can work a special kind of healing magic.
Breath. The simple act of taking mindful breaths in and out centers and calms. Slow, deep breathes do not invite panic or hysteria, and they can help, in time, to instill clarity and acceptance.
Sunlight. Light brings warmth and optimism. Look for light daily.
Beliefs. There is truth in the proverb “This too, shall pass.” Understand that both joy and sorrow are impermanent - both have their place in the world.
To Try: Healing Walks
There is something about forward motion that encourages movement and progression of thought too; contrasted with the swirling thoughts that can come with sitting. Make time for a long, solitary walk (of approximately 60 minutes) in natural surroundings, on a clear day. No music. Just the sound of your own deep breaths and the sounds that nature gifts you with as you move. Whilst you walk, for the first 20 minutes, walk at a medium pace, and do your best not to think, but to observe. Look all around you and soak everything up – plants, trees, the sky, clouds, people, animals, the man-made elements. Walk with wonder, as if you are seeing it all for the first time.
For the second 20 minutes, delve into the cause of your pain. Walk at a slower pace. Observe it and feel it. Try not to branch off into the reasons for it or other people’s inputs. Just focus on the feeling of the pain itself, and feel it. Imagine it deep inside you – burrow down there to find it, and acknowledge it fully. Stop and stand still for a bit if you feel you need to.
For the final 20 minutes , increase you pace to faster than medium, and switch to free thought – anything you like, and about anyone you like. No rules about what comes to mind.
For your final few minutes, switch back to nature and a medium pace. Have as few thinking thoughts as possible and go back to your breath and what you can see around you. Soak it all in. Remember the sense of wonder at everything you see, whether it is natural or man-made, and be aware of your breathing.
Spending 60 minutes in nature, and with your mind and your body, may provide you with just the right level of processing and perspective that you need – here’s hoping that this helps!
Photo by Ante Gudelj on Unsplash